Indiana Microbrewers Fest 2014: The Good, The Bad and the Advantages of Wearing a Kilt 

By Donovan Wheeler of Indiana On Tap

The Indiana Brewers Guild’s Microbrewer’s Festival began for me with an unexpected opportunity to toss out my good-deed for the day.  As we worked through the enormously long, but surprisingly efficient, entrance line, Wendi, Jim, and I couldn’t help but notice one dude in the line across from us sporting a dark brown kilt.  My immediate thought was that he was promoting one of the brewery’s Scottish ales; after all, one of the other operations offered up a crew of cleverly-donned pirates serving up their beers, so it seemed a logical assumption.

Soon, however, we realized that he was just a fellow in a kilt, and I’ll give him this: as far as wearing a kilt goes in 21st century Indiana…he mostly pulled it off.  I wondered for a second if I could do the same, but a brief inquiry with Wendi gave me the “hell no” I was expecting in very short order.  As the line reached the entrance, we overheard this gentleman (who was holding cash) speak to one of the event employees, and the three of us realized he didn’t have a ticket.

“Sorry,” the gate-worker said to the kilt-man, “we’re sold out.”

Bummer.

Moments later, when two comic-book-loving-Warcraft-playing types asked if anyone needed tickets I pointed across the line and offered the easiest description of a stranger I’ve ever pulled off: “The dude in the kilt needs one.”

“Hey,” one of the gamers said, “Kilt-man!”  Kilt-man was working his way out of the entrance, heading back down the line presumably begging for a ticket, further presumably willing to pay much more than face value for it.

“Kilt-man!” the other man shouted; still no response.  Finally, the two threw out a coordinated, hyper-attenuated, single-word yell: “KILT!!!”  The kilt-man turned, raced toward them, made the money/ticket exchange and entered the beer festival looking like he’d hit three 7’s at the slot-machine.  In a manner of speaking, he did.

While I allowed myself my self-indulgent moment of back-patting, I also marveled at the sheer enormity of this day.  Maybe a kilt is fairly common fashion accessory (I’m really not clothes-savvy in the least, and if you could see the pained grimaces on Wendi’s face when I get dressed each day you’d understand).  But my hunch was that this fellow went with a tad bit of flair because this was a big day.  And judging by the lines, the size of the crowd, and the surprising number of people wearing their favorite brewery’s t-shirt, it’s a safe assumption that this was, for craft beer lovers, the biggest day of the year.

When that biggest day of the year arrives, you want to bring the best you’ve got, and you want to leave your audience with the impression that your time on the stage was the highlight of the day.  On the largest stage, surrounded by the biggest draw, last Saturday’s festival was a chance for emerging breweries to showcase their contributions to the craft beer scene, and it was likewise a chance for the kingpins to remind everyone there why they make the beer people most want.  The former group brought all they had to bear and offered an amazing experience for craft beer lovers.  The latter…?  Well, they showed up, and there’s at least that.

Some of my favorite emerging and newly-established breweries did indeed bring their clichéd “A-game” and delivered good product samples for the crowd.  Cutters’ General Brown and Broad Ripple’s Red Rye were both delicious treats, well-balanced and smooth across the palate.  Oaken Barrel (out of Greenwood) served up their Indiana Amber, one of my personal favorites, and a beer I always snag at the local store here at home.  And their Super Fly IPA was particularly rich and distinct.

Bloomington’s Function Brewery threw three great beers at our group, and we each happily traded one another’s Belgian pale, amber, and coffee milk stout.  The latter of the three was especially smooth, and a very nice break from a mostly-across-the-board line-up of pales and IPA’s.  Despite the aforementioned over-abundance of hoppy beers, when we reached Daredevil’s tent, we made sure to take a swig of the Lift-Off IPA.  There’s something about that beer that Jim and I both like, but it was Jim who came up with the most effective analysis:

“G—Dammit!” he said, “that’s so good!”

While it did indeed turn out to be difficult at times to find some of the “off-season” beers, I was able to stumble onto quite a few good ones.  Scarlet Lane’s Dorian Stout (which I singled out after the Fishers event) remained a perfect signature beer for the increasingly popular brewing company.  Likewise, Black Swan brought their best offering a very tasty vanilla brown and probably the single most distinct beer I tasted the entire day: their Pulla Chile Porter that almost makes you want to chase it with a glass of ice water.

Shoreline, out of Michigan City, provided their Beltane Scottish Ale, which in my mind rivals with Cutters as producers of the best Scottish Ales in the state.  Also, Bloomington Brewing Company’s Ruby Red and Three Wise Men’s Hubbard & Craven Porter were fantastic personal hits, beers I will always keep on my radar when I scour menus in the future.  The final highlight for me happened at the Indiana City tent, when I slowly enjoyed my sample of Shadow Boxer, a perfectly balanced stout that makes my occasional 85-minute trips to the East Side worth it.

Even though the experience was plumb with amazing brews and passionate people eager to share their artwork with the rest of us, other companies “squandered” their moment on the big stage and sent a message which left (if you’ll pardon the pun) a bad aftertaste.  One of those organizations—a rather big one from way up north—showed up with less than an hour’s worth of their most popular beer and then, with a full 45 minutes left in the event, had folded up their operation and cleared out.  When we first arrived, the line for these guys almost reached the bluegrass band playing on the deck at the hill below them.  We had decided we’d come back toward the end, but when we found the vacant tables waiting for us, I mentally decided I was done with them.

Another big brewery sent their usual cadre of unenthusiastic hired help who poured their beer out of cans and pitchers.  But the worst offender came from one of Michigan’s biggest names.  As we approached the Bells tent, Jim raved to me about a beer they called Hop Slam.  When we reached the table however, Jim’s inquiry was met with sardonic hostility:  “We only brew that in February,” Bell’s lackey said with a patronizing tone of smugness.  “That’s how we roll!”

“I’m never buying Bells again,” Jim muttered to me as we left the tent.  Whether he follows through with his promise or whether I follow through on my own regarding the two Indiana breweries remains to be seen.  Personal and emotional whims aside, the larger lesson I took from the experience is probably not only true for breweries at a beer festival, but for any business at their biggest trade-show of the year:

Rule 1:  If you can’t send Captain Kirk, you’d better send Spock.  If you can’t send Spock, then you’d better send Bones McCoy, and if you can’t send him, then don’t even bother showing up.

Rule 2:  Bring enough of the beer you know everyone wants.  If you run out of that in 30 minutes, you’re telling Indiana’s craft-beer lovers that you really don’t give a s*** about them.

Frustrating as the small ripples of discontent were, the passion and love from so many other Indiana craft breweries—mixed with an eclectic and fascinating crowd of enthusiasts—created a fun, entertaining, and delicious way to spend a beautiful Saturday.  We can all debate whether this festival is the Super Bowl of craft beer events in the state of Indiana, but since so many great organizations brought their best beers and their brightest people to the tents, we can all agree that we left feeling like we got more than our money’s worth out of it.